The Secrets of Giving
Here is the secret to get what one wants. It is just giving. The reasons for it are based on the well-known philosophical dictum “Which comes first, the chicken or the egg?” The egg, and the chicken that is born out of it, create the circle of life, and form the basis for a profound comparison for attaining and giving what one wants: the circle of joy. This brilliant concept is analyzed in the clear voice and lucid prose of Masami Sato, the author of the book named ONE.
As human beings, most of us have yearnings for different kinds of things. And of course, the fundamental principles of economics tell us that while needs are unlimited, resources are not. This makes us think that the more resources we have, the more yearnings we would be able to satisfy. As such we tend to safeguard our resources. We would then feel that giving away these resources or splitting it between many would lessen the portion that can be used to get what we desire. This is the conventional win-lose strategy that is being played out.
Then, is it true?
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What if the answer turns out to be “no”? What if it in fact contradicts the secret of attaining more? What if the secret of attaining more is in itself simple – by giving more?
You can get something simply by giving. Just like you can have eggs by breeding chickens. Just like that. Natural. Automatic. And it’s an absolutely joyful experience.
First, let us start with a small comparison to explain things.
Chicken and Egg: The Circle of Life
Philosophers have made this query ever since time dawned, “Which comes first, the chicken or the egg?”
The answer to this endless discussion is simple: It actually doesn’t matter because both chickens and eggs are here now. But if we want to have more great outcomes, we can choose to start somewhere.
Giving and Receiving: the Circle of Joy
What happens, if we pose a different question? “Which comes first, giving or receiving?”
Again, for better results, we have to begin somewhere. Giving away things to others is definitely far simpler than attempting to get it first!
What happens when we try to get it first?
If we yearn to own something, naturally we would try to get it. And once we get it, we would try to hold on to it. This is absolutely normal – it does make sense logically.
But the actual result of ‘trying to get’ is mostly not ample and actual long term benefits.
For example, desiring to see others joyful is not about finding the joy from them or managing them to become happy. It is about how much pleasure we can give them and share with them. Period.
So how do we start to get what we desire?
By starting from the other end of the circle- by giving generously!
When we start giving before we even have what we hope to get – that which we dream of – we are sending out a powerful message to ourselves which tells us, ‘there is enough, and more will come.’ It allows us to sense the joy today – the joy of giving.
We only need to give out the love generously to others. It simply comes back to us. Giving love is the only way to be generously loved. When we acknowledge everyone for the great things they do and the great qualities they have, again it comes back to us. Others acknowledge us because we acknowledge them.
In the same way, if we wanted to have enough in our life materially, financially and emotionally, we just need to share the things we want generously with others.
Some are ready to give more physical things like time. Others opt to give what they can spare financially, like money. Those who give more (time, money, compassion, love, thoughts) have these things in abundance because it is the surplus. And surplus is the natural law of life.
Just keep in mind the rule of the game
One rule: never expect a return when we give.
When we have the expectation that giving should create ‘getting’ something back, we get upset when we don’t see the result coming back immediately to us. We may even hold unpleasant feelings towards the recipient of our gift. And clearly, holding a negative feeling for someone is not a pleasant or kind thing to do! So we can feel the real joy of giving when we’re doing something for others knowing that we’re simply doing it for ourselves-we’re doing it for our own joy!
Losing to win, giving to get..
In the beginning it may look as if we are losing. However, at some stage we recognize that taking things without giving is not an acceptable life pattern. And we have been aware of it all throughout. That is why tithing has been a normal part of the lives of many people who were leaders. And they did not do it with any fanfare so it was not done to gain popularity. It was done because it was a way of life.
Look around yourself. ‘Lesser’ creatures do it naturally. The bumblebees take the honey of the flowers and in return pollinate the flowers, thereby making them bloom. They do it in accordance with the laws of nature. They do not do it as a part of any law of justice. That is why they create permanence, without even making an attempt to do so.
Giving is just being who we are, it is just like having; not greater or lesser. No difficulty, no conditions attached, just releasing oneself.
The real secret of getting more can be summarised in two steps: Give first, and do not expect anything in return.
When we let go and give open-handedly, what we require would come to us. On its own.
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